and there were jokes

3 Aug

SO MANY OF THEM

Here, I’m going to try and start with the easier ones to remember and then go on. Bulletted for ease-of-reading! Aren’t I considerate? (and no, I am not explaining them.)
HERE GOES:

  • “MY LORD!!” and then EVERYONE LAUGHED.
  • “Hey girl HEYYYY!”
  • Giselle’s ratass purse, and then our little mascot.
  • THE GIZZ-BEACON
  • Graydon’s vajayjay
  • “Come snuggle with me!” AND WE LOL’D.
  • NESTS
  • “You. Sit there.” “Okay.”
  • “PAYNUS!”
  • “You have to shake your hips! You’re just moving your torso!”
    “But I-I can’t-”
    “TRY HARDER, BITCH!”
  • Deb. “Hey bitch, let’s do some shit!”
  • “IT DOESN’T WORK!”
    “Let me try again!”
    “NOOOOO”
  • “There’s my Chippy.”
  • “SHIT!”
    “PISS!”
    “FUCK!”
  • “So if you look at my pictures, you’ll cry. And if you look at Gizzy’s, you’ll jizz. So everyone who goes over there is crying ‘n’ jizzing and everything.”
  • Pussypussypussy marijuannnaaa~! And the accompanying dance, which was pretty awesome.
  • Impromptu erotica! Between Graydon and I, no less. And then: “It’s Will.” I LOL’D SO HARD
  • “Oh my god, so edgy!”
    “LIKE A FJORD!”
    “BAHAHAHAHA”
  • YES… MY SONNNN
  • “Carol, get your hands off me.”
  • FABIO AND THE KID PETTANQUE. They had style.
  • “Now that I know he’s a manwhore, it’s even more appealing.”
  • BRUSH TIME
  • TOASTY
  • “Oh hey, phallic symbol!”
    “WHY do you keep pointing those out?”
  • Graydon’s Sputnik
  • “Someone give me a fan, please. Thank you. -fans self-“
  • “Don’t drink that, you’ll become a hemophiliac.”
  • “IT SOUNDS LIKE MARIACHI MUSIC.”
  • “Oh yeah, Sai- Giselle’s uncle is coming in today and we were going to go with her to drop her off at the restaurant, you can go to Collette if you want, we’ll meet you at home.”
    “Oh, I’ll come with you!”
    “-facepalm-“
  • THE SLIDE AT TUILERIES. And the subsequent almost-tipping-over of Billy and Giselle.
  • “Graydon, you’re going to get raped if you go to Ghetto Paris.”
  • “Yeah, we tried to see how much stuff we could fit into Gizzy’s vag. It’s pretty expansive.”
  • “LACHLAN BONDING?!”
  • “I just want a salad.” AND 91 EUROS LATER, HE GOT HIS FRIGGING SALAD.
  • The Winter Phallus/Palace/Garden
  • “Oh my god I would definitely screw Nia.” LOL
  • “We have to go to FNAC.”
    “LIKE NOW.”
  • Laundry is immeasurably intense.
  • “Crack my toes, dwarve.”
  • MYSTERY WOUNDS
  • “Feet outta my nest.”
  • RAVE SOCKS
  • “OH! THIS IS ALL BLARE’S DREAM! ‘Cos in Graydon’s dream, he’d be a lady, and-”
    “HEY.”
  • Graydon’s “bear claws”
  • “OH MY GOSH, OF MONTREAL?! I LOVE THEM!!!”
    “-stare-“
  • DINOSAURS
  • The puking kid on the funhouse at Tuileries
  • “YOU! Get in the closet!”
    “okay”
  • “INSIDE VOICE!”
  • Fairy Paradise and subsequent CocoRosie songs
  • “Token black friend?!”
  • “Forever young! Buy your tickets and you’ll be forever young!”
  • “Billy is so gay for Hugo Boss.”
    “Yessssss.”
  • “Oh mai gawwwwd you’re basically my girlfriend now.” LACHLAN I LOVE YOU.
  • Rewriting poetry to include porn!
  • “Aww hot damn, this is our jaaaam…”
  • “So I don’t know if I got the right mustard or not, and my mom’s gonna be all ‘WRONG’ and I’m gonna be like, ‘Eat it, BETCH.'”
  • KEEPIN’ IT CLASSY
  • Billy is a pimp. Graydon is his ho. They are also bros.
  • WHY AM I ALWAYS TEAM MOM?!
  • Ghetto Paris: Awesome.
  • “SOFT HANDS!!!”
    “NOOOOOO!!!”
  • The “display” on the shelf
  • THE WEED GHOST. OOOOOOH MYSTERIOUS.

That’s about enough for now. Here’s a video!

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